Practicing Alchemy: Part 1
Practicing Alchemy Part 1: Let's Do It
Alchemist: Someone who transforms things for the better
In 2019, I had a recurring dream that I was standing in an art gallery observing people viewing art that I created. The art was of what must have been a billion hearts in the image of people who would creatively change the world. After the third time having this dream, I woke up, I began painting a billion hearts and somehow they took form exactly like the paintings in my dream.
Though most of the paintings have been created, there is a journey that I must embark upon in order for my Personal Legend to be realized. Today, I have decided to start my journey but instead of a crystal shop, my first stop is to be a t-shirt print shop and an art gallery. I don't know how long this part of my journey will last, but I will be intentional to make the most of it.
The past few years have been incredibly difficult for the world, me included. Between losing several family members, dealing with the implications of COVID, and living in my car for over a year - life for me ain't been no crystal stair. However, there has been some incredible moments such as obtaining amazing jobs which have afforded me the opportunity to work with two of my brothers, gaining a new niece, and getting a new car.
Through the golden days and the stormy days that's happened since that initial dream, I have learned first hand that ALL things do indeed work TOGETHER for the good. The storms have been equally as beneficial as the gold in moving me toward the life that God has for me and following my heART has given me a hope that my Personal Legend will be realized if I just keep going.
With a faith the size of a mustard seed, I am confident that this will be only Part 1 of "Practising Alchemy". This dream is not my own, it originated in the soul of the universe and it is my mission on earth. I will find treasure in my heART and the entire universe will conspire to help me achieve my dream of creatively changing the world, with love.
Let's Do It.
“It’s the possibility of having a dream come true that makes life interesting.” — Paulo Coelho
UppaYonda
I know she’s living the good life in her Heavenly home, but life has been hard without my mom. It’s crazy because some good things have happened and some dreams have been realized. She has new grandchildren that she’s only seen from Heaven and the other ones miss her just as much as me.
I’ve felt like I was on cloud nine and I’ve come dangerously close to giving up. My brothers kept me here and I put way more on them than they could bare. They had to cast their cares onto Jesus, for me - and when all I could see is pain, they lifted me in prayer. 2022 was a rough year.
People always say if they could see their loved one just once more or talk to them once more or if Heaven had visiting hours that would ease the pain. I’ve never even been that strong. I don’t want a visit or a day, I want my mom with me, every day and even though she had been battling for many years, I would’ve been there for the battle… awaiting Victory. She was never supposed to die. What’s a momma’s boy without his momma?
I don’t even have any inspiration here. Just praying for all those who feel my pain and for the ones who don’t… love on your mom. I know it may seem like she will live forever but life can be very hard to understand. My heart is broken and I don’t know if I’ll ever see it fully mended on this side, but I will keep going because she did.
Because the race isn’t given to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, but to the one who endures: he will be saved. She endured some crazy pain and God saved her from a deathbed and called her home to be with Him. Oh death where is your sting? Oh grave where is your victory? When I see her again we’ll both be dancing, because victory belongs to Jesus.
I’mma endure to the end. I’mma make it Home too. Goin’ up yonder, to be with my Lord.
Today, I am grateful for Seminole High.
The opportunity to teach at the best High School in the country was a dream come true. I decided in 11th grade that I wanted to teach, after my AP Literature teacher made me fall in love with reading and writing. Sitting in that classroom I would envision myself helping students at Seminole fall in love with reading and the art of storytelling.
Teaching at Seminole was surreal for me. The staff was the most amazing group of people I’ve ever worked with and the students are all full of promise and energy. I absolutely loved every single day of my time there.
I am most grateful for Ms. Beasley for always looking out for me; Ms. Pearson, my high school friend turned high school instructional coach/friend; and Mr. Abney who is really not just an amazing AP but a genuinely great man.
I will be continuing my journey in helping youth get summer jobs, training, and internships. It was an unexpected opportunity, but I know that all things are working together for the good. In my interview I stated that I saw myself at Seminole forever, and really, I still do. I will still be of assistance to the students of Seminole, just in a different capacity and I am excited about the future of us all.
You all have inspired and blessed me more than you know. Thank you for accepting me, making me laugh, and showing me that I have so much to be grateful for - every day.
I look forward to seeing you all again but until that day, thank you for the memories dear and true.
Seminole High, all hail.
Tears the Season
In my mind, we were gonna get through this and Christmas this year was gonna be LIT!
Christmas was supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year and my moms spirit would help me decorate, shop, and be jolly. That never manifested to my reality, I decorated little, didn’t buy much, and this Christmas season has been the most chaotic and challenging time of my life. I almost died, several times - no exaggeration. My brothers saved my life, several times - no exaggeration. I have been through the fire - no exaggeration. I lost my mind, several times - no exaggeration. I have learned that stress attacks your health and your wealth and no matter how hard you think life is, it can get harder - no exaggeration.
But, God.
God let me go through much more than I could bare and through this time I learned to cast my cares on Him, for He cares for me. He showed me that His love for us on earth is just as real as is His promise for us in Heaven. He helped me to just keep going, and gave me brothers to carry me when I couldn’t go another step. He showed me that everything I needed,
God is.
My mom LOVED Christmas & she didn’t play about decorating. Instead of putting up garland and wreaths the day before Christmas, we put up a small tree and pressed through. Ok, my brother put up a tree. We even found a box of gifts my mom had bought the kids. We kept going and realized that even in the midst of some hard intense times…
God is Good.
God is good even when I don’t feel good. He’s good when things looks bad. He’s good when things are going well. He’s good when my heart is heavy and He’s good when my belly finds laughter. He was good when she gave us the best Christmas memories at home and He’s good now that she’s having the best Christmas at Home, with Him.
God is good, all the time - no exaggeration.
How can I say thanks
For all the things You've done for me?
Things so undeserved
Yet You gave to prove Your love to me
The voices of a million angels
Could not express my gratitude
All that I am
And ever hope to be
I owe it all to Thee
To God...
Be the glory
For the things He has done
Love’s Image
A Father is the epitome of Love
A Mother is Love, too
And when love is made
The end result is You
Made in Love’s image
You are a vision of God’s own heart
World changer, History maker
You, are priceless art
WE are blessed to be a blessing
WE were created for our call
WE are one-of-one billion hearts
WE love God. WE love all
Love’s the only thing that won’t fail
It’s what we sing about, speak, and read
Created from love, with love, to love
Love is all WE need.
God is all WE need.
Creatively Changing the World
…is God’s job. Our most important job is to work on changing ourselves. WE have to acknowledge Him in all our ways. WE have to hate vain thoughts and love His law. I’ve always thought that if WE all put our time, talent, and treasure together WE could literally change the world - end hunger, help the youth, help the imprisoned… all that. But WE can’t do much until WE submit our lives to Jesus and seek first the Kingdom of God. WE can help who WE can, but only God can and will change the world. God is Love. Love will change the world and in the end, WE will reign with Him.
“
For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.”
Wake Up and Pay Attention
Lately I have been waking up without joy. I’m sure it has something to do with the recent death of my mother, coupled with my insecurities and fears.
My mother was my why. For as long as I can remember, it has been my life’s goal to make her proud. She was fun, kind, loyal, motivational, and inspirational and always challenged me to keep going in pursuit of happiness.
My insecurities have always been louder than my confidence. I’ve always compensated with my smile ((that is now down about 7 teeth)), my afro ((which grows much slower nowadays), and my bright white eyes ((which went through a season of bright red)).
At my mothers funeral I gave a speech and mentioned that we shouldn’t be skurred because we have God himself for us and a host of ancestors surrounding us. And even though I believe this, fear still cripples me.
Most nights I’m awake past 12am. In doing this, I am usually starting my day scrolling through social media, watching netflix, or stuffing my face. I have made it a habit to carry the previous day and its worries into the new one, instead of going to sleep to rejuvenate and waking up to a new day.
Until today. Today, I am making the decision to go somewhere and be somebody. I am choosing to heed to the words God gave me when I first had the opportunity to serve people experiencing homelessness in 2006.
The time is now or never, to make this dream come true and His joy will come in the morning and be my strength.
Something Way Bigger
There is a painting that I have been thinking about doing for three years now. I have started this painting three times now and have yet to get past 100 or so hearts.
Why? Because I know that this one is special.
The dream in which I saw faces in hearts was a reoccuring dream and in the fourth dream, this painting was the focal painting of an art show. It was an image of some of my favorite entertainers and it celebrated some of my favorite music.
But it was so much bigger than that. It was the affirmation of a dream I had that together, we would creatively change the world - with love!
My favorite quote is one by Marianne Williamson and it states that our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. I find this statement to be true. I am not fearful of suceeding, I know I am a winner. I am fearful that once I create this painting, I will now have to step into something bigger.
Now it would be time to really creatively change the world.
Here goes something.
WE’re Blessed 2 Bless… Let’s do it.
of Mice and aMen
It was really too early for a 10 year old, I thought.
In my first memory from that day, I was in a ceremony, honoring students from all over the state with medals and trophies. In hindsight, I know my parents were incredibly proud, but at the time I didn’t really see it. I was incredibly tired.
After watching a live performance of Beauty and the Beast, the Principal took my parents and I to lunch at Red Lobster. He offered me anything I wanted off the menu, and of course I chose chicken nuggets and fries. However, I did make sure to order a hot brownie with ice cream for dessert. I may have been in Heaven.
As we walked to our car, a man ran up to us out of the blue. We did not see him coming, he just appeared. He began to tell my parents that I would be a great man and would go on and do great work. He told them that God had His hand on my life and that He would use me to change the world.
My dad wore his signature huge smile and my mom weeped as they held on to every word. Before we could thank him or ask his name, he dissapeared just as quick as he came. My dad circled the parking lot looking for him but we never found him.
That day, we celebrated with a mouse and were visited by an angel in the form of a man.
Blessed, indeed.
The Fight is Fixed
For some reason I was mad. I’m not sure if it was something that happened at home or at school, but I was not in the mood to be kicked. When his foot connected with my leg, my fist swiftly connected with his jaw, then his eye, and finally his two front teeth stained my hands with the red drippings of victory. I was not only fighting for that moment, I was fighting for the past: finally getting revenge for all the times I had been picked on in the past and simultaneously fighting for my future: making sure everybody in this school knew not to try me again.
While the students were saying that I “won” the fight, I didn’t feel like much of a winner. I made one of my favorite college interns cry and I had completely acted out of character. After school, my parents came to pick me up from my grandmother's house. Looking back, I realize they knew about the fight already, my dad didn’t normally come to pick me up but this day he did. He walked in with the biggest smile on his face and asked me, “How was school?”
The win was affirmed by a personal trip for lunch at Pizza Hut! Yes! Just my parental advisory and I celebrated my win with Pizza! My dad was so proud of me and said, “now kids in middle school would think twice about messing with you.” I wasn’t sure about that, but I wasn’t trying to fight anymore either.
The following year in 5th grade, I won Walt Disney Dreamer and Doer. Imagine! The kid who the year before was meeting the Principal for the first time for beating up another student was selected to be in a Disney parade? I knew that there were better behaved students and certainly students with better grades - why was I chosen? I have no idea, but I do believe that God set it all up for me to meet an angel and to affirm who I would become… A dreamer & doer.
A winner.